Bonus Mini Show: Nicole Diamond's Personal Story About Her Dyslexia

In this "Bonus-A-Rooney" episode of Everyday Masters, host Craig sits down in a jacuzzi with his wife, Nicole, for a candid conversation about her experience with dyslexia. They discuss her journey from struggling in school to becoming a successful entrepreneur. She shares about pivotal figures who helped her reframe her understanding of dyslexia from a hindrance to her superpower. She also touches on parenting a dyslexic child and the empathy and patience she's acquired from her own experiences. This emotional and inspiring episode offers a relatable and uplifting narrative for those coping with dyslexia.

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Transcript

Craig: 0:00

Hey welcome everybody to this first"Bonus-a-Rooney" episode of Everyday Masters. If you're just here for the first time, do yourself a favor. And go back. For sure don't start here. If you do want to listen to this Bonus-a-Rooney, please go back and listen to Episode 11: Jamie Hooper. An amazing guy, who now has mastery teaching math to children with dyslexia and other language based difficulties. So here's the setup for the bonus. I need to tell you a little bit about my wife, Nicole, who I love so, so much. normally we will hang out in the jacuzzi and I will play her a rough cut of the episodes. She's another set of ears. She'll help me clean them up. She'll give me good ideas. Also a little bit of background about her. She is somebody who has had a very successful career in weddings and makeup and in the makeup industry. She is a natural leader with a ton of confidence. She is beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, on the outside, but even more beautiful on the inside as you're about to hear. So we're in the jacuzzi, we're doing our listen through of my rough cut of the Jamie Hooper episode. And what we realized very quickly is, that Nicole has a lot that's going on for her. And it's because of this. And Nicole is dyslexic and Nicole struggled, from a very, very early age in school. And so if you listen to Jamie, he's talking about. his approach to teaching these kids well, Nicole was one of those kids. So we're in the jacuzzi. I have my phone with me. And I start recording on my phone and interviewing Nicole doing her own Wrapper-Upper of the Jamie Hooper episode. Without further ado. Enjoy.

Nicole: 1:55

Well, like you guys were talking about early on in kindergarten. No, in preschool, I was held back because I couldn't learn my phone number. So everyone has a little paper phone and you had to memorize your phone number and I couldn't. So in Pre-K they were like, something's really wrong. And I couldn't learn the alphabet. And so I knew early, early on something was wrong. And so from that moment, I was held back. By first, second grade, I was tested. I was bopped into every school you can think of trying to help me. and I felt dumb. And I felt like I was never going to get it. And I felt very awkward, and then that makes you socially awkward because you're so angry by the time you go to lunch or go hang out, you're just so fried from failing. And so, like, the hope of... You're not going to fail because you've already failed at that point. And then by sixth grade, I was, well, fourth grade from all that I was in, literally took the short little bus to a different school. And my mom would cry every day when I would leave and tutors and this and that. And then they had me in a school where I went to a different classroom and that's embarrassing. But by sixth grade, my Mr. Winston said, I see you.

Craig: 3:15

So who's Mr. Winston?

Nicole: 3:18

He was my sixth grade teacher, and next year, 7th grade, you're going into, you know, junior high, where, that was the last thing I wanted, and he pulled me aside and said, I see you, you're really smart, And we got to get you out of this special ed and I'm going to work with you. And just someone seeing me, not as someone that was failing, but that you were going to be successful and taking the time to teach different, you know, I'm 56 years old. So back then and.This was a traditional teacher in sixth grade saying, we're going to do this different. And he took cards and different things for me to learn spelling words and numbers. And, but someone investing in me and believing that I was smart. And he told me every day how smart I was. He's like, you, your IQ is off the charts. How you dissect things are faster than most people in math. How did you do that? And he asked me to show him. And so I think having someone believe in you and saying, Hey, this is probably never going to be easy, but if you work harder and smarter, and that's just kind of how I had to accept it, is that I was always going to have to probably work a little harder than everybody else, but he gave me hope. And in one year, I went from the little... Classroom, awkward and angry, to out of special ed, and in the regular classes. And once I just accepted things were going to take me longer, and I was going to do different, and I needed some assistance, I accepted who I was, which changed everything.

Craig: 4:54

Ah, accepting who you were. He helped you accept you.

Nicole: 4:57

That I was really smart. I was really smart and I just learned different and that's it.

Craig: 5:04

So you went from thinking you were dumb and then a teacher came into your life that actually told you you were smart.

Nicole: 5:12

Yes. And said, you're really smart. And so we, like the Play Doh and the different, and the books and the money, it was someone not standing up talking at me. It's like, how do we dissect the same problem to get to an answer and that would light me up. Like, Oh, I am smart. I just see it different. And that hope and acceptance that yes, I have dyslexia. I flip words, numbers get, you know, ahead of me. As you know, when you try to talk at me to show me something, I'm constantly grabbing it from you and saying, I need to hold it. I need to touch it. so the hope and acceptance that I'm smart.

Craig: 5:55

So after getting out of high school, let's say you have always, your dyslexia never went away. You've always experienced similar kinds of challenges in the world. How have you maneuvered as somebody who has dyslexia as a successful adult? How have you done that?

Nicole: 6:17

I think what Jamie said is I quickly found mentors. That had what I wanted and once I got that confidence that I was smart and someone, just one person, you know, I started gravitating to those people and I wanted to break through and so I knew I needed to be in a somewhat of a creative atmosphere. I wanted to go to college. I wanted to go to the normal college. And I think again, kind of after high school, knowing again that it was just going to take more effort and that I was gonna need help and asking for help and finding mentors and people or teachers or friends or a career and going for it and not letting my dyslexia stand in the way, like own it up front.

Craig: 7:09

What about this?'cause I've, I've been with you for a long time now, and I. I think you have a superpower that came from this. I've noticed, well, first off, you're an incredibly confident person and you don't get down that much, which is interesting from somebody who started. From this place of feeling dumb and broken. Ironically, I don't see that in you much at all. Like, you're emotionally tough. On top of that, you know how to maneuver in the world in a way that, like, I can't see. You know how to get places, you know how to do things, you, are so fast on your feet. You're better than me at a lot of this quick thinking, maneuvering stuff. You have great intuition. Do you see that? Do you see like that because of how your brain works? Are those skills, those other skills, do those come out of the dyslexia?

Nicole: 8:09

I think everybody, no matter how you learn, regardless of a learning disability or whatever, we all have weak things in this. And because this was such a challenge, then I, I had to overcome. So a teacher's going to call on me, I'm going to have to read out loud, I'm not going to do that. So I have to figure out quickly, how am I getting out of this or surviving? And so it has given me the superpower of kind of seeing the world and I'm always on alert and thinking, okay, what's next and what am I going to do in any situation? And I think... You know, someone, and I can only speak of, you know, dyslexia and a learning disability is you get the superpower of surviving in very uncomfortable situations your entire life. And each time you kind of maneuver through it, you're like, Oh, I did that. And then you see yourself like in sales, you know, and being an artist and working with people, I quickly connect and I can quickly dissect things that take other people longer because I've had to survive.

Craig: 9:16

But I think you almost see life in situations like chess. Like you see a situation and you're playing through the next five, six or seven moves. They're going to do this. Then I'm going to do that. Then they might say this, then I'm going to do that. Then they do this. Do that. I am in my moment. I'm like in my moments. They do something. I'm not ready for it. I have to sit and think for awhile. You already have like five, six, seven moves ready to go. They come out fast. Is that true?

Nicole: 9:46

Yes. I mean, I never knew it until like kind of breaking it down and then seeing in my son who's dyslexic, it's like, you're so fast. Just add, like, in a situation, it's come in anything and it can be at the grocery store, it can be change that's going to be given to you, it can be reading the back of an ingredients and you're not seeing it and you're like, okay, this isn't happening. So what am I going to do to get through this and make my next move? And so I'm always in every, almost sometimes exhausting, but I'm already pre planning my moves. And if that doesn't work, what's next? And if that doesn't work, what's next? And if they do this and I do that, I'll do this. I just think of kids that have this is that I could promise you, you have a superpower. You know, there is so much hope. There's so much brilliance. Anytime you have a deficit in one area, there is this superpower in another. And finding that superpower and owning that, yes, I See the world different, has made me who I am.

Craig: 10:49

And what about having a child? We of course, will clear this with Max, but, we raised Max. We did know early on that just like Jamie talked about, we knew what we were seeing. I think it was, very difficult for you because it was almost triggering. You were like re traumatized as Max went through school, reliving all of it. How difficult was it for you with dyslexia to then parent a child with dyslexia?

Nicole: 11:19

Beyond. I mean, you're just like, Oh no. Early on, every night we, you know, we read with the boys. Every books around, all the things, because I probably overly wanted books around, and overly didn't want the boys to have what I had. And I saw it early on, and it was devastating, because I just was like, oh no, and saw him saying, Mom, I can't read, and everybody else can. What's wrong with me? And there was two beliefs then. One was, we don't tell them. And because if you say that you have a learning disability, then you're already disabled. And the other belief is mine, which is find out early, get help, and don't try to push through traditional learning. And like, let's own this thing and give them hope because there's so much hope behind someone that has a learning disability. So it's like. We did everything from, tutors, school, special ed, I mean, everything you can think of. And he still struggles, I still struggle. It was so hard to know that I passed this down. And... The only thing, I see in Max is similar to me, is that, again, someone that can land on their feet in a situation no matter what, and can move in the world very fast, and survive probably better than the average person. If you put us against people without learning disability in a survival mode, we'll win.

Craig: 12:48

That is very true, and Max is the same way. Doing a Wrapper-Upper for the Jamie Hooper episode, specifically, what, what are your thoughts about what you heard from Jamie that really struck a chord?

Nicole: 13:03

So many. I mean, again, getting someone that already is walking in the door was such a failure. I mean, it breaks my heart because by the time they get to him, they've already been tested, and the three days of testing, and the parents being frustrated, and you know you're hurting your parents, and you're hurting yourself, and you're different, and he knows that. Like, you just want to be seen, and like, for someone to say, I know, this hurts, and I'm going to get you out of it. I've got your back. We're going to figure this out. And you're, you're smart. You're brilliant. And he tapped into that. And that to me is everything in life is just, you want, every person wants to be seen and doesn't want to think they can't do it. And for one hand to put out and say, I see you and spend the time that he asked you to prepare because it's not like, okay, open your books. We're just doing this. He has to think on his feet and get creative because everybody learns so different. So that's inspiring. And the Everyday Master, to have a teacher who doesn't have a learning disability, have the patience, which, you know, you get frustrated with me and you're probably the most patient person I know in the world, because it's frustrating to be around someone who kind of like zots out, I mean, you kind of, and to see Jamie saying, get your kids tested. Find out, don't give up, believe in them. They're not going to fail. They're not going to, you know, not make it and take a breath and be patient. and find a new way. Just, you know, brings tears to my eyes.

Craig: 14:37

Where do you sit with your own dyslexia today? Do you have shame when you think about it? Do you still feel broken around it? Or does it flip in a lifetime and become something you own as a piece of you? Not, I don't think you're proud of it, but... You see it as an ingredient of who you are and you're more open about it. I mean, I don't think you walk around telling people, uh, Oh, you do. So, so let me ask you today after, now becoming an adult where we're less, frankly, we give a shit less about what other people think about us as we get older, but where are you with your own being a dyslexic person? And how do you wear it today?

Nicole: 15:23

I think what it's given me is great empathy. Which, and patience, and that right there is a gift. I wear it very proud because I realize I'm very smart and I'm good at things. Almost everything I go for, I go to the top, and I'm willing to fight through all of it. And trust me, I'm doing Excel spreadsheets and writing and emails and stuff I can't do, and I warn everyone. Hey, I'm dyslexic. I'm going to send you an email. It's probably going to not have the correct punctuations. I might make a mistake, but your goal, if I'm running a huge company, and it's numbers and selling, we're, I'm going to get you there above everybody. And so I wear it really proud, because I know it's made me who I am, and I'm good at a lot of things. And so quickly, when I write, I look, my handwriting looks like I'm a second grader, and I tell people, and I chicken scratch, but... I'm really proud of who I am, and I don't really own it as a disability anymore because I think it's made me who I am, which is outgoing and empathetic, and I reach for the stars because I've had to fight through a lot to get where I am, more than the average person.

Craig: 16:36

So how important... was Mr. Winston for you, when you think back about it as a character, and how important are people like Jamie Hooper in children's lives?

Nicole: 16:49

Everything. I mean, that's going to make me cry. It's everything. The Mr. Winston and Jamie Hoopers. They give people, hope, survival, and the patience that you're not broken. And as an adult, I got to go back and tell Mr. Winston what he meant to me. And I kind of draw from that all of the time, of how someone believed in me. And hearing Jamie's story, that's like, it's life changing. And that's why I think of parents and teachers, it's like, to have these people, they have no idea, Mr. Winston had no idea how he impacted my life until I got to tell him as an adult. And hearing Jamie, it's... It brings tears to my eyes as you hear, is that we have to have these people that are willing to not, you know, they're not making the big bucks. And we're only 8 to 10 percent of the world, so really, why? Why, you know? Why invest? And it takes people like that to say, to invest in us, that make the difference, who believe that we're, we are special and we're worth it.

Craig: 18:04

Oh, you are special and you're worth it to me, my love. Thank you for our first ever in the Jacuzzi Wrapper Upper I love you. I love all of you. And I really don't like to fight with you because you're 15 steps ahead of me. I'm the worst fighter with you. I got one move and then you have 18 that come right after it and I don't know what happened. And I'm in a pretzel. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, you know that. She knows that. Okay. I love you.

Nicole: 18:34

I don't know what part we can put in there, but no matter what, it was, you know, thinking about it and listening to it was amazing. And your patience and grace with someone like me, you're lucky.

Craig: 18:46

oh, I'm lucky. Every day.

18:49

Whew. Humdinger right? There she is the wonderful Nicole Diamond, hope you enjoyed this bonus episode and we will see you next time on Everyday Masters.